The Apprentice: Artemis Fowl Edition
by Holly's Home Girl
Summary: Well this kinda just came to me one day when my dad was watching the Apprentice. Artemis creates his new tv show, and invites some friends to join in the fun. Who will be the Apprentice to Artemis Fowl II? Read to find out. REVIEW WHO YOU WANT TO WIN
1. Introduction: Welcome to the Apprentice!

**Ok, now i don't own any of the characters in this story, if i did i would be living in a big fancy mansion instead of writing fanfictions that make me laugh (and i hope you too!) I had a lot of fun writing this so i hope you have just as much fun reading it!**

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THE APPRENTICE: ARTEMIS FOWL EDITION

(Theme song plays…) MONEY MONEY MONEY! MOOOOney!...

Artemis: Welcome everyone to my television program. I have been through an extensive list of candidates and have decided the following people will be on my show…

Captain Holly Short of….the military….

Foaly…there is a big smudge on this paper….

Foaly: (laughs off screen)

Holly: (hits Foaly) SHHH!

Artemis: Ahem….sorry people...anyway, the people who will be on this television program….

Mulch Diggums…the ummm…special person….

Julius Root…again in the military…

Julius: What is he doing here! (points at Mulch) What am I doing here! I'm dead!

Holly: Wow! You're alive! (Gives Root big hug)

Julius: Get off!

Mulch: Shut up!

Julius: How dare you convict!

Mulch: Oh ouch that hurts but you see…I am not a convict any more…I AM FREE!

Holly: SHHH!

Artemis: AHEM! Butler will you make them shut their mouths and let me speak!

Butler: (takes out Sig Saur and shoots into the air twice) I think they will be quiet now.

All: (silence)

Artemis: Okay…next we have…a Chix Verbil (he looked on recon's system for officer names.)

Holly: NOOO!

Chix: Holly!

Holly: (grabs commander's shoulders and shakes him) KILL ME NOW!

Butler: (fires two more shots into ceiling)

All: silence

Artemis: Now I am going to hurry up with these names so I can finish before the show ends! We have, Trouble Kelp, Grub Kelp, wow, what interesting names, --'…

Holly: Trouble's is fine but please tell me you didn't say…

Grub: I am suing the owner of this place, I nearly tripped in the doorway, and they don't have any snack machines…

Holly: (Bangs head on table)

Artemis: AND we have…oh you must be joking…Opal Koboi…

All: WHAT!

Artemis: Don't blame me blame the writer!

Me:(Runs away)

Artemis: Well this was extremely wonderful…I hope this doesn't end up like Martha's Apprentice attempt…We will be split into teams and the teams are as follows….

Team 1

Holly Short

Opal Koboi

Foaly…There is another smudge!

And Chix Verbil…

Holly: NOOO!

Chix: makes kissy faces

Holly: Gags

Artemis: Ahem…

Team 2:

Mulch Diggums

Julius Root

Grub Kelp

And Trouble Kelp.

Root: Oh great…I am with the convict!

Mulch: And I am not a convict! So get used to it!

Root: snorts

Artemis: Will the teams get together and decide on a team name already!

Holly: Geez you don't have to be so mean about it!

Artemis: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRR…(regains composure)…ok…let me explain the rules, I, Juliet and Butler…

Juliet: (waves at camera)

Artemis: Ahem…will be judging your progress through the challenge…

Chix: What! You mean we are on television! (writes phone number on a card and sticks it in camera lens) Call me!

Holly: (bangs head on table) AHHH!

Artemis: Get in your groups and name yourselves!

(Team 1's room)

Holly: (sitting as far away from Chix as possible)

Chix: (sits as close to Holly as possible)

Foaly: Okay let's bring this meeting in order…

Opal: _I_ want to be captain!

Foaly: Does it really matter?

Opal: it mattered in high school!

Foaly: OH! No you didn't!

Opal: Oh, yes I did! I won the science fair! Ha! Ha HA!

Foaly: Oh! But I am not in jail so HA HA!

Opal: I am here because I need exercise after a few years in the psycho-ward

(knock on door)

Holly: I'll get it! (opens door because wants to get away from the ever closer, Chix)

Artemis: (comes in) We had a last minute entry…

Harry Potter: Hi! (looks at elves, pixie and centaur) Wow I feel tall! (turns around and sees Butler) Andnow I feel short again…

Holly: Hi!

Harry: Wow, it can talk!

Holly: grr… (strongly dislikes Harry)

Chix: (Gives up on Holly and moves on to Opal) Hey what are you doing for dinner?

Opal: The nice man in the white coat gives it to me in a tube!

Chix: Err...alright...(is disgusted and moves back to Holly)

Foaly: Ok what should we name the team?

Harry: "Magically Menacing"!

Holly: "Chix-b-gone"!

Chix: I like that, but I think that "_Short_ and Sexy" is better…

Holly: YOU LITTLE PERV! (Whacks Chix with mallet)

Foaly: I think let's go with Harry's…cause no one else has any ideas…

Opal: I have an idea! How about "Opal's Angels"?

All: Ummmm…

(Team 2)

Julius: Alright let's get this over with…

Grub: I hate everything I am telling mommy you won't let me pick the name!

Trouble: Will you shut up!

Grub: Oh! I am telling mommy on you!

Trouble: Oh please!

Julius: DO we have a name yet? (Notices Mulch stealing stuff ) HEY!

Mulch: What can I say? I am what I am.

Julius: GRRR…

Grub: What are we supposed to do? If I don't win this thing I am going to sue Artemis for every penny he's worth…

Trouble: Yeah, right. You couldn't tell a lawyer from a pumpkin…

Grub: You mean he didn't have a skin condition?

Trouble: Oh my gosh! You are the most annoying brother on or under this earth!

Grub: (Begins to cry)

Julius: Does anybody have a name?

Mulch: I do! Evil-con-evil

Julius: What…!

(knock on door)

Mulch: I got it. (opens door and steals doorknob in process)

Artemis: we got another last minute entry…meet Hermione Granger.

Hermione: Hello…eww what in heavens name is that! (points at Mulch)

Mulch: (raises hand to make rude gesture and all the things he stole fell out of pockets, and other places) Oops…

Julius: (turns red/purple) CONVICT!

Artemis: Do we have a name?

Mulch: Evil-con-Evil!

All: WHAT?

Artemis: okay…

All: (get up to strangle Mulch)

(back in special room)

Artemis: Well we have are two teams, Magical Menaces and Evil-con-Evil. Wow you people are extremely bad at making up names…I am expecting a third person from your realm I presume? (is talking to Harry and Hermione)

Hermione: Errr…not quite…you see Ron had a little accident…

Harry: "Little"! He blew up Hogwarts because he found a spider's nest in it!

Hermione: (sadly shakes head) Those spiders never had a chance…

Artemis: Oh…well, report here for your first task tomorrow at nine o' clock, on time if you will.

Grub: NO! I sleep till ten o' clock then mommy wakes me up and…

Julius: Shut up! I slept for an extremely long time…seeing as I was dead, which I still don't understand at all…

Butler: Here. Tomorrow. Nine o' clock.

All: nod

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**This is only my second fanfic! check out my first _Fowl Days_ by me! Next chappie will have the first task, let's see how they do...**


	2. Buy or Die! Part 1

**Hello! its me! I decided to keep updating this because i got nice reviews saying i should keep writing! Thanks bananasrokk and stormrider7!**

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(theme song plays) Money Money Money! MOOONEY!...

Artemis Fowl: Welcome back everyone to The Apprentice: Artemis Fowl edition. I would like to say how mu—

Holly: Who sings that stupid theme song!

Artemis: Excuse me I was speaking, Ho—

Holly: ANSWER THE QUESTION!

Artemis: That is classified information and—

Holly: (Points Neutrino at his head) TELL ME!

Artemis: Mulch.

Mulch: You said you wouldn't tell anyone!

All (except Mulch): (Laughs)

Artemis: Ahem….Well let's get started, your first task will be to sell my newest product Fowl Ade in New York City.

Grub: New York City! That is so far away! I need to pack all my things, and get some nausea medicine, and---

Trouble: (hits him with brick) Be quiet!

Harry: Great, I know that everyone wants to buy drinks from a bunch of midgets!

The People: (Twitch)

Holly: Artemis, didn't you tell—

Artemis: Well! We better get started!

(Magical Menaces in room coming up with strategy)

Harry: (grumpy)

Foaly: Let's get started!

Chix: I have an idea!

Holly: (suspicious) Yes?

Chix: We could buy coconut bras and grass skirts…

Holly: NO!

Chix:Oh well…I have another idea!

Holly: (annoyed) YES?

Chix: We could have Holly run around drinking the stuff naked in times square!

Holly: WHAT! (Beats Chix to a pulp with mallet)

Foaly: Well, the coconut idea was…colorful, to say the least…any other ideas?

Opal: We could threaten people! "Buy them or die!"

Foaly: Good idea, but there might be some legal issues—

Opal: What? My idea's not good enough for a stupid pony as yourself?

Foaly: What! How dare you!

Opal: ( sticks out tongue)

Foaly: Opal, you…you….are like so, immature!

Holly: Okay, now we have to concentration the task ahead! (locked Chix in closet)

Foaly: Holly is right! We have to stop fighting and set aside our differeces and work together—(realizes Chix is in closet)

Holly: (swallows key) No way in hell.

Foaly: Holly.

Holly: NO!

Opal: I'll open it! (takes out bazooka)

Foaly: Opal I don't think—

Holly: SHOOT IT OPAL!

Opal: Yippee! (shoots at closet)

Chix: (screams like a little girl) D'Arvit! (realizes Holly is watching)

Holly: Start talking Foaly and I want straight gnommish!

The People: (start speaking Gnomic)

Harry: (Feels out of the loop) Hey…

People: (continue to speak gnomic)

Harry: (confused)

Foaly: (in gnommish) Okay now does anyone have a good campaign strategy?

Holly: We smile at everyone and ask them to buy stuff.

Chix: Yea, good idea but how about Holly is wearing a Hawaiian dancer or a belly dancer outfit!

Holly+Foaly: No.

Opal: How about we dress as terminally ill orphans and pretend to sell Fowl Ade to pay our medical bills!

Foaly: That is just wrong, but, it probably will make us a ton of money, so… LET'S DO THAT!

Holly: Fine (notices Chix about to speak) No coconuts.

Chix: (silences)

Foaly: I guess we're done! (back to English)

Harry: Yes and I am forgotten, again, by the author.

Me: Sorry Harry!

(Evil-con-Evil's room)

Grub: I can't believe it!

Trouble: (annoyed because his brother has been complaining all day) Yes what is it now Grub?

Grub: I just saw the polls and you know what? I am the least liked "person" on this show!

Julius: Well…er…isn't that a surprise…

Trouble: …

Mulch: Wow, Grub! You managed to make the entire world hate you in one day!

Grub: (offended) I AM TELLING MOMMY ON YOU! (reaches for phone)

Trouble: Oh no you don't! (Smashes phone with giant hammer)

Grub: NOOOOO! THAT WAS MY ONLY LINK TO MOMMY YOU BIG MEANIE! WAAAAAAAAH!

Trouble: I am ashamed to call you my brother.

Grub: (continues tantrum)

Hermione: Does anyone have any ideas at all?

Julius: We could threaten people to show them my scars if they don't buy any!

Hermione: I highly doubt that—

Julius: (shows scars by lifting shirt(scars from exploding))

Hermione: (pukes)

Mulch: I like it!

Grub: Eeeeeeeeeew! That is so gross!

Trouble: That is why it will work! (shoves Grubs head into the carpet)

Grub: Guf adef!

Hermione: But the police-

Julius/Trouble/Grub: We ARE the police.

Mulch: I just think its fun!

Julius: I especially don't care if some prissy mudgirl like yourself is gonna get squeemish!

Hermione: I beg your pardon!

Julius: You heard me and I am not taking orders from a mudgirl!

Hermione: (seriously pissed off) Fine then. If you want to threaten people at random on the streets of New York, GO right ahead. But…if your going to threaten someone, I believe it will be more effective if we use other methods of persuasion…a little bit worse than scars…

Mulch: This is going to be good.

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**Yes this time I will write chapter 3 sooner! I actually have it written here...I just don't feel like typing right now:P**


	3. Buy or Die! Part 2

**Hi there it's me! Well, all you people probably thought I died. I am so sorry, i was really busy this summer and i finally got my hands on a copy of The Lost Colony! I live in the US so i had a hard time getting it. Well i got it so i decided to update, sorry for the wait!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Artemis Fowl, or the Apprentice, and if i did I would be rich girl, na na na na...**

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(Theme song plays) Money Money Money! MOOONEY!...

(New York City –Magical Menaces)

Holly: Hmm...Where do you think we should set up?

Chix: In front of Victoria's Secret!

Holly: (Hits Chix with mallet) NO! YOU ARE SUCH A PERV!

Chix: (bleeding internally)

Foaly: I think Times Square would be good...OPAL! WHAT _ARE _YOU DOING!

Opal: (Climbing Empire state building with Foaly's carrots in her mouth) Munchy Munch Munchy!

Foaly: MY BABIES! (Runs after Opal and in the process hits camera man)

(Screen blackouts)

Mechanical voice: ----PLEASE STAND BY----

(New York City- Evil-con-Evil)

Hermione: This group is intolerable!

Julius: (turning purple)Calm down missy. I asked you where we should se up!

Mulch: In front of the _MOMA_!

Grub: Yay! I didn't know _MAMA _was helping us!

Everyone: ...

Julius: How stupid do you think I am Mulch?

Mulch: Why, (trying to look innocent) Whatever do you mean?

Julius: (turning a deeper shade of purple) You're just gonna steal everything when my back is turned!

Mulch: (mulch's thoughts, _No, really?)_Ouch Julius.

Julius: Once a convict, always a convict...

Mulch: (beaming) Now, we both know that's not true.

Julius: (about to strangle Mulch)

Hermione: Let's GO! (grabs everyone's collars and drags them to Central Park)

(Meeting room)

Butler: (sighs) Artemis, why did you make this show?

Artemis: It is another one of my brilliant money making schemes.

Butler: All I see are problems...

Artemis: Butler, Butler that is why your intellect is so inferior to mine.

Butler: (lying) I see...

Juliet: Did you see Opal! (not listening) THAT was hilarious!

Artemis: Ahem...Juliet, how are the teams doing?

Juliet: Oh my god did you see that! That witch girl dragged all four of those guys all the way to Central Park! HA!

Butler: So...What do we do now?

Artemis: (trying to sound cool, yet still smart) We shall view the video recordings repeatedly, laughing and vomiting!

Juliet + Butler: WHAT!

Artemis: We shall laugh..."till we puke?"

Juliet: OH! Why didn't you just say so! (Jumps back in front of TV)

Butler: (no clue what Artemis is talking about) I see...

Artemis: So, what were you attempting to say about Opal Koboi?

Juliet: Oh my gosh! Here's the tape!

All: (laugh)

(Magical Menaces)

Holly: Fowl Ade! (cough cough) It is our last chance for survival in this cruel, cruel world...

Harry: Please help these starving, dying orphans by just buying a few bottles of Fowl Ade.

Chix: I'll buy some!

Harry + Holly: NO!

Foaly: (Hiding behind counter because people won't buy from someone with four legs,) (although I probably would...) Look someone's coming!

Random stranger 1: Hey there, what are you selling?

Foaly: (glances at hundreds of signs they put up.) Can't you read...?

Holly: (shushes Foaly) (coughs) We're selling Fowl Ade to help the orphans (cough) with their terminal illnesses and (cough) making the world (fake weak smile) a better place to be. (cough)

Random stranger 1: (in tears) I'll buy twenty.

Holly: (handing stranger Fowl Ade) Thank you sir and that'll be $65.88.

Random stranger 1: (pays) (runs away crying)

Team: YAY! WE DID IT, WE DID IT!

Foaly: Now all we need to do is sell (picks up calculator) nineteen thousand, nine hundred ninety nine thousand, nine hundred and eighty.

Team: (sad)

( Evil-Con-Evil)

Mulch: (singing) The Hills are alive with the sound of---

Julius: Oh shut up!

Mulch: You're just jealous because you can't sing!

Julius: I can so

Mulch: Prove it.

Julius: (scared) Umm...well...see...i just...

Mulch: Chicken! (clucks)

Julius: (glances at camera) why now? can't we do this later?

Mulch: now.

Julius: FINE! (begins singing songs from Barney-Clean up, clean up...)

Team: (Laughs)

Julius: (growls) FINE! BE THAT WAY! ( sings O Solemio perfectly)

Team: (in awe)

Random stranger 2: Wow what a lovely voice! How did you get that way?

Julius: Well I was born like—

Hermione: He drank Fowl Ade and now he sings like an angel!

Random stranger 2: I'll take 50!

Mulch: (in disbelief) Bottles! That is a lot!

Random stranger 2: Not bottles, cases!

Grub: (faints)

Everyone else: (in awe)

Hermione: (is handed wad of cash) Thank you so much! Please come again!

Mulch: Leave your address! We'll send you more!

Julius: (glares at Mulch)

Trouble: We made 1000 dollars! Whoo hoo!

Hermione: Yes, but it is only the beginning...

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**How'd you like it? Review! PLEASE? Oh and tell me who you want to win. **


	4. Buy or Die! Part 3

**Hey its me, and i am sorry about the wait, i have been really busy. I decided to post in celebration of TLC coming to the US (although i already have it) **

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Apprentice or Artemis Fowl, if i did, i would live on the moon with a big bubble house!**

(Theme song plays) Money Money Money! MOOONEY!...

(Meeting Room)

Artemis: Welcome back everyone. It is now time to check on the teams. Butler, please tell me the status of Magical Menaces.

Butler: Well they sold 4 cases of Fowl Ade sir.

Artemis: Hmm...That's not a lot. Juliet, what about Evil-con-Evil?

Juliet: They sold...wow! They sold 51 cases, sir.

Artemis: Yes that is quite a lot...how _did_ they do that?

Juliet: An opera singer bought 50 cases.

Artemis: Why would she do that?

Juliet: This tape might tell us...(puts on tape)

All: (Watches tape of Julius singing and opera lady coming over for Fowl Ade.)

All: Oh...

Artemis: Pretty clever, but wait until my decoys get to them...

(Magical Menaces)

Foaly: We sold 4 cases! It's a miracle! (does happy "4 left hoof" dance)

Holly: (grimaces) Foaly, the other team is winning.

Foaly: (stops dance) What!

Opal: It's all your fault! I sold the 4 cases so I win! HA HA!

Harry: (seriously annoyed) That's not how this works, midget.

The People: (twitch)

Harry: We have to sell more than them! After all, Foaly, You are the project Manager.

Foaly: WHAT! Who decided that and when!

Harry: Weren't you listening to Artemis when he assigned them?

Foaly: I have no recollection of that particular event.

Harry: He did it off camera. Remember?

Foaly: (remembers) Oh, uh, um, that... something about how I am responsible for the team right?

All: (nods)

Foaly: So, Opal. How did you sell those four cases?

Opal: (all smiles) I threatened to kill the guy!

Foaly: Well then let's do that!

Holly: You can't be serious—

Chix: (jumps over to stand holding dirty looking store shopping bags) You'll never guess where I've been!

All: ...

Chix: I went to the Happy Happy --bleep-- store! Hey, Holly! I got you a present! Opal you too!

Holly: YOU STUPID PERV! (hits him with case of Fowl Ade)

Chix: (unconscious)

Opal: Yay! present! (goes through bag and pulls out the skimpiest outfit you can imagine) Is this for my Barbie?

Holly: (mad) Rawr!

Foaly: Holly, take a deep breath...

Holly: (deep breath) Ok, I'm fine...

Chix: I'm awake!

Holly: RAWR! (Hits him again)

Bottles: Break (crack and spill all over Chix)

Foaly: You better pay for those!

Chix: (unconscious)

Opal: YAY! BABEQUE! (Tries to eat Chix)

Dr. Argon: (hidden in bush and shoots Opal with tranquilizer.)

Opal: Mommy... (Knocked out for about 25 seconds...)

Harry: Well this is just wonderful. Someone's coming.

(Decoy 1) Random stranger 3: Hello.

Opal: (awakens) BUY SOME! (Jumps on Decoy 1 Random stranger 3's head)

(Decoy 1) Random stranger 3: AHH! What are you selling!

Opal: FOWL ADE! NOW BUY! (Begins biting his head)

(Decoy 1) Random stranger 3: AHHH! (Falls on ground)

Opal: RAGHWA! (Bites (Decoy 1) Random stranger 3's arms)

Holly: (pulls Opal off) Sorry sir, she has...mental health issues...I apologize; maybe some Fowl Ade will cheer you up?

(Decoy 1) Random stranger 3: NO! I AM LEAVING AND TELLING EVERYONE NOT TO COME HERE!

Holly: Sir—

(Decoy 1) Random stranger 3: I AM SO ANGRY I THINK ILL TELL THE POLICE ABOUT THIS!

Holly: I—

(Decoy 1) Random stranger 3: DO YOU EVEN HAVE A VENDOR'S PERMIT I MEAN LOOK AT THIS PLACE!

Holly: (twitch) You—

(Decoy 1) Random stranger 3: OH PLEASE! YOU WOULD NEVER PASS A HEALTH INSPECTION LET ALONE GET A PERMIT!

Holly: THAT'S IT! (Picks up Decoy 1 Random stranger 3)

Foaly: Finally some entertainment! (Takes out popcorn)

Opal: SHARE! (Steals popcorn)

(Decoy 1) Random stranger 3: I AM CALLING MY ATTORNEY!

Holly: (throws him into time square)

(Decoy 1) Random stranger 3: OW! I FELL ON A TAXI CAB! YOU WILL BE HEARING FROM MY--- (is hit by truck)

Opal: (Driving truck) MY POPCORN!

Foaly: GIVE THAT BACK! (Galloping after her)

Chix: (awake now) (Looking at the new clothes he bought for Holly) Ooooh! Look at this one Holly! (Raises up _that_ kind of clothes)

Holly: (flamey eyed) (turns on Chix) GRRRRR RARAWR! (Attacks Chix)

Chix: EEEEEK!

Harry: (bored and reading a magazine)

Holly: (continually beating Chix with bottles of Fowl Ade)

Opal: (Destroying Times Square)

Harry: Well isn't this just lovely. (Continues reading magazine)

(Meeting room)

Butler: Umm...Artemis, are we going to get sued?

Artemis: Probably.

Butler: And your not worried because?

Artemis: Because I will make whoever caused the damage to pay for it with their money. I also find this rather amusing.

Juliet: Oh my GOSH! LOOK AT WHAT SHE DID TO THE GUY YOU HIRED! HE'S, LIKE, ROAD KILL!

Artemis: (almost throws up) Ahem, disgusting.

Butler: Ummm...now should we be worried?

Artemis: No, it was clearly an accident.

Butler: What? (Confused)

Artemis: Butler, go outside and convince any onlookers it was an accident (pulls out wallet and hands it to Butler)

Butler: Oh. (Leaves)

(Evil-con-evil)

Mulch: We really don't have to sell anymore considering that the other team sold like...4 cases when we sold about 50.

Hermione: 55.

Mulch: Whatever! Let's go have fun!

Grub: YAY! KNITTING CLASS! (Takes out ball of yarn and knitting needles and begins making scarves at lightning speed)

Trouble: (bangs head on table)

Mulch: How does he do that? (Watches Grub)

Hermione: We need to concentrate people!

Julius: (sleeping)

Mulch: (in awe)

Grub: (happily knitting)

Trouble: (developing a concussion)

(Decoy 2) Random stranger 4: Umm...Are you attempting to sell something here?

Hermione: Uh...Yes, I know it doesn't appear that we are but, we are.

(Decoy 2) Random stranger 4: This is the worst stand in all of New York!

Hermione: What?

(Decoy 2) Random stranger 4: YOU HEARD ME! WHAT IS THIS? NO SANITATION STICKER? ILL HAVE YOU IN JAIL BY NIGHTFALL!

Grub: (stops knitting) (Looks at Decoy 2 Random stranger 4 in disbelief) HOW DARE YOU! I SHALL REPORT YOU TO MY MOMMY!

(Decoy 2) Random stranger 4: Wha--?

Grub: YOU ARE A BIG FAT MEANIE HEAD!

(Decoy 2) Random stranger 4: (snorts) Wow is that the best you can do? Yo mamma's so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest; they said "Sorry, no professionals."

Trouble: Oh boy...

Grub: (snap) You $#$& &&! I am gonna $& your $#$! Don't ever talk about my mommy like that you $!

Everyone: (stares in disbelief)

Grub: (rips open (Decoy 2) Random stranger 4 and-----Bleeped for violence-----)

Everyone: Ohhhhh...ugh, uh...

Mulch: (screams like a five year old)

Julius: (vomits)

Hermione: (faints)

Trouble: (calling lawyer) Oh hello, its Trouble...yes he did it again...

Grub: (is eating (Decoy 2) Random stranger 4)

Trouble: Yes now he's eating the man...

Grub: RAWR! (hides in tree)

Trouble: Now he's running away...oh yes, ill get rid of the evidence...

(meeting room)

Artemis: Will you please stop covering my eyes, Butler? Really it can't be that horrid...

Juliet: Ugh...what a way to go...

Butler: (pukes)

Artemis: Let me go! You're ruining the carpet! Ugh! (notices Grub + (Decoy 2) Random stranger 4) OH! MY GOD! OH, OH! BLEH! (hides under table)

Juliet: (watches intently as Grub devours (Decoy 2) Random stranger 4)

Artemis: (clearly shaken) umm...did anyone see that?

Juliet: No, he was the only one nearby...

Butler: Uh, yuck, that's the worst thing I have ever seen, and I have seen a lot.

Artemis: (regains composure) Yes, now I must inform the families and friends of the two men I hired about their demise, and how it was completely accidental. Butler, get me my mobile phone.

Butler: Yes, sir. (gets up to go)

Artemis: Butler, one more thing,

Butler: (turns to face him) Yes, sir?

Artemis: Tell everyone the winner will be announced tomorrow at six o'clock pm.

Butler: Yes, sir.

**Okay, read and review please! the more reviews i get the sooner i update! (Yes i know that's mean) Vote for the team that should win and who should get "fired"!**


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